Ross-Dean Locksmiths

It’s been probably 10 years since last coming across these things. This house had 6 of these horrible mechanisms that had broken. (A massive garage spider was living in the frame of one of them). Most of these windows ever fitted broke years ago and have already been replaced. The Tallon system can be very secure but in reality it just means they’ll break and jam your windows securely shut.

With the correct tools and equipment it is possible to repair UPVC jammed windows and fit a modern system in their place. That is much cheaper than completely replacing the windows. Hopefully these will be the last Tallons we need to work on. I’d hope it was the last time a huge window spider runs up my arm but that’s been proved wrong already this week.

The vehicle pictured below was crashed/recovered without the keycard. You can see the airbags have deployed. A new remote has now been programmed to the vehicle. Typically the airbag module needs to be replaced/reset before the vehicle will run.

Car keys.

This little piece of metal (biro tip for scale) below snaps in a particular make/model of UPVC door multipoint. If it breaks the door is jammed shut. The same part had broken off in 6 other doors at a single property we attended recently. That rendered all the doors jammed shut.

The doors were carelessly installed / had moved out of alignment. Correctly aligning the doors when they became difficult to lock would have prevented this failure. Instead the problem was ignored until one by one, the mechanisms broke and the doors couldn’t be opened. That 1.5mm x 2mm piece of nasty diecast metal will snap off if undue force is required to lock the door.

The particular component shown below from another particular UPVC door make/model is responsible for around 80% of door failures in new/recent builds that we get called to. We can see 2 or 3 of this broken part in a single day. It’s not unusual for a badly fitted door to jam shut the day the customer has moved in, or the builders haven’t even handed it it over yet.

Squirting WD40 in the lock, or filing parts off the frame might make your door work better temporarily. Unless you correct the fault it is just delaying the inevitable.

UPVC repairs

The above type of remotes was used on older Mercedes vehicles. They were unusual in that the remote does not use transponder in the conventional RF range.

Instead these remotes communicated their unique ID to the vehicle via infra-red. The LED looks much like that you’d find in a TV remote. Unless a correctly programmed remote was detected the EIS (electronic ignition slot) would not turn.

Sometimes when people replace the battery in these remotes the IR LED becomes damaged or bent. That can prevent the vehicle from starting. It is much simpler to add a spare remote to these vehicles than it is to replace one if all remotes are lost/broken.

This style of remote is still used on current vehicles such as Chrysler/Dodge/Ram. Instead of the Mercedes type IR LED they use a conventional transponder. Depending on the vehicle the remote can have up to 7 buttons doing different functions.

At this time of year we see a spike in UPVC door and window related issues. Increased heat can cause UPVC to become more flexible. Bi-colour doors that are dark outside and white inside are more likely to warp if they get the sun on them. As the ground dries out buildings can shift leading to door misalignment. All of these can cause a door to be difficult/impossible to lock/unlock.

Spraying WD40 or similar isn’t going to realign your doors, nor stop the house settling. If you ignore a door that is difficult to lock don’t be surprised if it breaks. It is always cheaper to correctly align a door than to open a jammed shut door and replace the multipoint.

It might sound ridiculous but I come across this jetwasher situation 2 or 3 times every year. Do not jetwash the engine. Do not jetwash inside the car.

If you’ve forced high pressure water inside and your car won’t start it’s no good calling an automotive locksmith. Programming a new key won’t help. What might get your car started is perhaps several thousand pounds to replace damaged electronics.

You’re away from home and have lost your van keys. You’ve spent hours searching for them. You call an auto locksmith to program you a new key. The locksmith asks you to pop the bonnet open and you see this….

The key was in the bonnet lock. Customer saw the funny side though. They’d filled up with antifreeze earlier in the day and the keys were still in the lock. A second remote was programmed while we were there so it wasn’t a wasted journey.

Some Transit Customs once locked with the remote, cannot then be started with the non remote key that came with the vehicle. If the alarm is active the vehicle may be immobilised until the remote turns the alarm off. A spare remote will avoid you having to call somebody out to get you going.

Once I arrived late at night to replace a missing Transit remote. As I stepped out of my van I stood on something in the grass. It was the customer’s missing remote. A few times every year we have calls from customers who have lost their keys while canoeing in the River Wye. One time we had Audi keys been thrown on the bonfire. Once a customer flushed their Ford key down the toilet in Lydney Hospital.

Normally we program vehicles for a mix of different brands from a variety of countries and continents. Unusually the last 5 vehicles we’ve programmed keys/remotes for were all made in UK. (That’s probably jinxed it now and there’ll be a stream of Asian vehicles).

Admittedly Land Rover, Range Rover, Vauxhall and Jaguar are all under foreign ownership

Many BMW keys cannot be programmed via the OBD (on board diagnostics) port. This is more secure for you because an oik can’t just plug their computer in and steal your car. About the only negative is that it can be more difficult to replace a lost key. BMW dealers can provide a key ready cut and programmed for your vehicle but it may take several days to arrive.

If you can’t wait for a dealer to obtain a key, the BMW immobiliser (FEM, BDC, CAS or EWS) can be removed from the vehicle and the information read/written directly to the EEPROM chip. This can also be used to erase a missing or stolen key to prevent it starting the vehicle.

Proximity/smart keys with a push button start have their own security concerns. A criminal can relay the signal from your remote/key to the car and drive off. Consider where / how you store this type of key when not in use.

This is the second case of a dog chewed Navara proximity remote that we’ve had recently. Nissan must be making these remotes especially tasty. Or maybe people who own these trucks tend to own naughtier dogs.

If your remote looks like the one below, don’t be surprised if your truck doesn’t start.

Don’t worry if you don’t have a spare remote. They can be replaced without recourse to a dealer. Of course the simpler solution would be for the dog not to chew on it. Or get a cat instead.